(7 minutes reading time + writing exercises)
Some visions of living and loving are outside the preconditioned comfort zones of the old world, and we cannot see their beauty if we are still in fear.
With these eleven steps we can free ourselves from old beliefs and open and expand into LOVE abundance.
1.
Take a look at this list of human needs. If English is not your first language, please make sure you translate any words whose meaning you are not sure of (or switch to the German version of this page):

I want to feel …
loved
accepted
appreciated
balanced
connected
understood
inspired
tender
safe
joyful
radiant
touched
grateful
desired
cherished
heard
embraced
kissed
cared for
caressed
adored
held
cradled
warm
included
motivated
supported
free
intimate
close
valued
respected
nurtured
peaceful
empowered
fulfilled
passionate
belonging
curious
encouraged
purposeful
treasured
2.
Are there any words that don’t ‘speak’ to you or that you don’t feel a resonance with?
If you like, you can replace them with other words that sound better to you. For example, some might want to add ‘ecstatic’, ‘juicy’ or ‘aroused’ and take out some other words.
3.
From a 13th dimensional perspective we can say that nothing else exists but ourselves, as everything we experience and perceive outside is just a reflection of ourselves. Ancient Vedic philosophy says that Brahman (All That Is) is no different from Atman (the Self).
So, on a spiritual level, we can argue that it is our direction of growth to become all this within rather than seeking it in the outside world.
And yet, as humans, we live in much lower dimensions, we have needs and wishes and that is nothing to be ashamed of. On our path to awakening, we want to connect with others with whom we can share our human needs on a mutual level. We don’t have to walk this path alone and we don’t have to live in a universe where we don’t allow an abundance of LOVE.
4.
Please read the list of human needs again and reflect on them: Which of these are fulfilled in your life on a daily basis, either because you are already able to give this to yourself, or because you have someone in your life who shares this with you?
Which needs are already realised on a weekly basis? And which are currently too often unfulfilled?
Please take a piece of paper or a notebook and make three columns with the labels: ‘daily’ / ‘weekly’ / ‘not yet’. Now write all the words in the column that suits you best.
You cannot do this exercise in your mind! It would lack the clarity that you are seeking.
If you like you can also circle the needs that are most important to you.

5.
Are you currently in a romantic relationship or are you looking for one?
Do you hope to share the unfulfilled needs and wishes of the third column with someone you trust and LOVE in a balanced and harmonious way, so that they may soon move into the first or second column?
6.
Let’s have a look at the more intimate human needs and wishes:
cared for
nurtured
adored
held
cradled
touched
tender
caressed
kissed
passionate
intimate
desired
(+ any words you have added yourself that fit into this list)
If you are single:
It is likely that some or all of these needs are in your ‘not yet’ column. How would your life change if you found someone with whom you could experience all of them at least ‘once in a moon’ (or: once a month)?
If you are in a stable relationship:
Are some of these needs in your ‘weekly’ or in your ‘not yet’ column? How would your life change if you found an additional trusted soul with whom you could experience all of these needs at least ‘once in a moon’ (or: once a month)?
Please take some time to imagine how you would feel that day (or night). And the next day? Would you float a little off the ground, be more radiant and vibrant? Would you feel more inspired and empowered?
Allow yourself some time to write down any feelings that come up as you consider this possibility. Just observing how you feel about it can help to shift your universe in the right direction.
7.
How about connecting with this trusted soul more than once in a moon, but as close friends, perhaps holding hands, maybe also cuddling together, and with the promise and growing anticipation of spending more sensual time together in just a few weeks? How would that enrich your life?
In my books about the magical world of Sanuela, this agreement is called a Moon Love relationship:

This is just an example, as there are many other types of relationships in Sanuela. See my book Human Connection, Unconditional Love,
New Relationships, and Sacred Sensuality in the World of Sanuela for more inspiration.
8.
Please be aware of any emotions or perhaps fears that may arise as you consider what it would be like to give your current or future romantic partner the same freedom. We will have a closer look at these in a moment.
Looking at what you wrote down for step six, do you feel that your partner deserves this as well?
How much do you trust your partner to keep within the agreed allowances and boundaries?
How does it feel to know that someone else is also nurturing and caring for your partner?
Would you wish that your partner could also feel adored by someone else?
Would you be happy to see your partner blossoming in a much more radiant LOVE?
Could you LOVE your partner even more?
Would your partner be more grateful to you than before, receiving this gift of trust and true care from you? Could your LOVE for each other become more fulfilling?
Please take some time to feel and write down what comes to you.
9.
Do you feel anxious or insecure just by imagining about your partner enjoying some kind of intimacy with someone else, even if it only happens once in a moon?
Perhaps this is too much for you at the moment.
If you wish to maintain a balanced relationship, you may want to wait with the fulfillment of your wishes, as you first need to feel more safe with these new concepts of allowing more LOVE.
Or, you could allow a little bit of it.

How would it feel if your current or future partner regularly held hands with someone else?
And how about a long hugging meditation with one sitting in the other’s lap (fully clothed yab yum) while both breathe through their heart chakras? See my books Hooray, I Am Human! or Ayana, My Light and My Love for more inspiration about this.
If you like, take some time and write down what you feel.
10.
Let’s take a closer look at jealousy. I wrote a whole book on it: Love Beyond Jealousy.
We use this word to describe a complex mixture of possible emotions: Insecurity, anxiety, obsession, possessiveness, distrust, envy, competitiveness, overprotectiveness, …
Can I tell you a secret?
Jealousy is never just the ‘problem’ of the one who feels it. If three souls are involved, it is their problem. As a team they can sit together, support each other and find solutions: What is needed to make everyone feel safe?
If all three souls want stability in their LOVE, then let them find it together. The good thing about this sitting together: From now on, there will always be a third as a supportive mediator to help restore balance, harmony and safety when challenges arise.
11.
Welcome to the world of an interwoven network of shared LOVE relationships. If we are willing to walk through our fears together, look at our shadows, grow and heal together, find trust and forgiveness, we can live in LOVE abundance.
Imagine what your personal universe would feel like.

Keep learning:
- Sanuela Living Community
(Step One: Nine-Day Exploration Journey) - Hugging Meditations