(4 minutes reading time)
Most people think that LOVE just has to happen – we meet someone, feel a spark, and suddenly, we are ‘in LOVE’: Our hormones take over. This idea is everywhere in our movies and books and seems to be the ideal we all strive for.
Have you ever wondered if LOVE could become deeper and more lasting if we opened up step by step and built a connection based on understanding and caring for each other, rather than hoping for the lucky win where the hormonal emotions of two souls spark at the same time?
What if we decide to let our LOVE grow steadily over time like a strong and stable tree, instead of igniting it quickly like a matchstick?
Could it be that lasting LOVE is less about ‘falling’ and more about rising together, step by step, after making a conscious decision to try it out together?
Let’s take a look at the pros
- Shared values and goals become clearer.
- Trust and respect develop at their own pace.
- Feelings grow naturally, without pressure or fear of not being returned.
- A deep friendship forms first, creating a strong foundation.
- LOVE is a choice, not a biochemical coincidence.
- You truly get to know each other before making big decisions.
- Less chance of being blinded by excitement and missing red flags. The connection is based on reality, not just dreams and expectations.
- More emotional stability – fewer extreme highs and painful lows.
- A sense of security grows because the LOVE is built, not just felt.
Good communication is one of the most important parts of a strong and lasting relationship. When LOVE grows slowly, there is more time to understand each other’s way of speaking, listening, and expressing emotions. Instead of being carried away by intense feelings, both can pay attention to how they interact.
Not every couple has a compatible communication style from the start. Some have grown up in families where interrupting is normal, while others are used to listening patiently. One may be more direct, while the other is more careful.
When LOVE is built step by step, there is space to adjust and find a balance –without the pressure of emotions running high. It becomes easier to say, “I feel unheard when I’m interrupted,” or “I wat us both to have a fair chance to speak.”
These little agreements prevent power struggles before they even begin, and it is easier to build a habit of respect so that even in difficult moments, both feel safe and valued. By practising fair, honest and loving communication together, both learn how to deal with multiple perspectives or disagreements in a way that doesn’t damage the relationship.
Getting closer as a beautiful journey
When neither is waiting for the hormones to kick in, both can explore the connection step by step, discovering what makes them feel safe, happy, and truly understood.
Beyond words and activities, closeness grows through the shared presence we can feel with each other just by sitting close together. Perhaps we would also like to try holding hands in silence or looking into each other’s eyes without speaking?
Hugging meditations can help both potential partners to feel each other’s energies. Simply stand or sit together in an embrace, focusing on nothing but heart chakra breathing and being fully yourselves.
In this precious moment of the eternal now, it is not about passion or desire, but about feeling safe in each other’s arms, experiencing togetherness. This kind of connection builds a deep trust that goes far beyond physical attraction. The body and heart slowly learn to trust, to relax, and to feel at home with the other soul.
We can then decide calmly if we want to make the connection more sensual. Do both feel ready, wanting to take this step, not just out of habit or desire, but because it feels right? Then touch can be explored in a way that feels natural and caring. We notice what feels good, what makes us feel safe, and what deepens our bond.
Intimacy becomes a conscious choice, not just an impulsive act. And because we have already built a foundation of trust, we know that no matter where the journey takes us, our bond can remain stable, deep, and real.